Call Them What They Really Are

“There are always two parties; the establishment and the movement” — Ralph Waldo Emerson

I have been thinking that we should change the monikers of our two-party system into more descriptive ones: Corporate Party (republican), Labor Party (democrat). I think that these names are so obvious that I can’t wait for them to be used everywhere in print (help me out here by using it liberally in your own texts and daily speech and thinking).

I think that the new descriptive names could catch on and voters would know exactly what they are payin … I mean voting for! Originally I had thought that our congresspeople and senators should sport vests with sponsor decals that announced their affiliations like NASCAR race cars: BOA, CitiBank, Shell, BP, stock market identifiers, you get my drift – but I realized that some senators and congresspeople wouldn’t wear their vests unless forced and to do so would truly be unAmerican and stepping on their free speech and the 5th Amendment.

Using expressive monikers such as Corporate Party and Labor Party cuts right to the bone as to any doubt about the person’s allegiance when it comes to voting platform when voted for by citizens in the voting booth. Now I know you are wondering about how religious backers will be able to identify their people running for office – this is easy, they fit into the Corporate Party (doubt this? look at their backers, their business structure, their alliances – the gold standard, for instance).

The Green Party could stay of course because that is exactly what they are – Green. Ron Paul would fit into the Corporate Party kicking and screaming but a spade is a spade and Paul (a Libertarian at heart) is definitely not Labor material. Romney, Gingrich, Santorum are all Corporate dogs owing everything to their masters.

Do these names ruffle your feathers? Well, they were designed to help you center yourself and understand what you, yourself, stand for core-wise. Perhaps you find that by openly identifying yourself as a Corporate Party stooge you will rethink your affiliations and take responsibility for how you vote.

The name change would do more to clean up voting fraud that disenfranchising the poor, elderly, disabled, college students and the dead, proposes to do. Corporate Party workers could “bus” in their typically way-too-busy-to-vote constituency to voting stations in l o n g limousines with glossy corporate ads and decals (really easy to identify) plastered on every available surface, which would be easy to tally for exit voting reports.

Labor buses would also be easy to identify, private vehicles, charity and work-pick-up vans and bright yellow school buses (off the school district dime, of course) would be easy to tally by the Corporate Party election workers and foreign country observers.  Middle class and the poor would find total affirmations in their chosen party, but it wouldn’t stop there because a class divide wouldn’t be the reason for the two-party renaming – lots of workers from all class backgrounds would find reasons to support the Labor Party.

“It is important that the United States remain a two-party system. I’m a fellow who likes small parties and the Republican Party can’t be too small to suit me.” — Lyndon B. Johnson